And Then There Were Three

Last week the dread of our failed IVF cycle hung over our heads like a giant rain cloud. Things were confusing, uncertain, and just plain sad. The weekend offered us a glimmer of hope for reprievement and we decided to go all out. We spoiled ourselves at the book store and bought some new throw pillows for our couch. We got dressed up for a wedding we attended and danced together the whole night. I had a couple Pina Coladas and cut and dyed my hair. We went on a date and slept in. We reconnected and felt refreshed when the week started again. We called our weekend, "consolation weekend". These were the small prizes we won to make up for it all.

On Monday our doctor called me from her personal number to talk about our cycle and our next steps. She started by telling us that 60-70% of the time transfers fail because of the embryo, not the uterus. While the embryo we implanted looked great, it could have been abnormal, we just don't know. We have done all of the standard testing on my uterus and even removed that polyp via hysteroscopy. This cycle my lining looked really great. Even though things seem flawless, my Doctor recommended doing a test for endometritis, just to be sure.

Endometritis is inflammation of the inner lining of the uterus. It requires a biopsy to see if I have it and if I do, some special antibiotics is all it should take. This is found in 5-7% of patients who have failed embryo implantation and the percentage is even higher in patients experiencing recurrent pregnancy loss. The percentage sounds so small, but if we have been this unlucky, it can't hurt to rule out. I've had a few pelvic procedures as well and it's a valid possibility that I'll test positive. The cost of a frozen transfer is so high it feels worth it to do the test and treat the endometritis if necessary. Honestly, I'm willing to do anything to increase the chances of our babies sticking around. The cost or the discomfort don't outweigh the reward of having our family.

Yesterday we got a phone call we've been waiting for since our first transfer. The clinic that genetically screened our embryos finally called us with the results. Of the 4 embryos we had remaining, 3 of them are genetically normal and viable for transfer. THREE! We can't believe it. We didn't have a lot of expectations about our results. We hoped for at least two to be normal and viable but knew it was possible that none of them would be. Some stars aligned for us and now we have three precious, beautiful, normal embabies waiting to be reunited with me. When I heard the news, I couldn't help but cry.

We have no clue when we will be able to transfer our little embryos. If it were up to me, I'd get the biopsy tomorrow and transfer the moment I was cleared, but lots and lots of money stand in the way. I don't know how I feel about waiting but I don't have much of a choice and will utilize the time I've got to get myself ready.

We know the genders of our little embabies. A secret we are keeping between us until it's time to share. I don't know what God I have to pray to or what spell I have to cast, but I'll do anything to will the universe to give me all of these babies. We want them and need them here. All of them. All three. Not at once, but definitely all three.

We are so grateful to know what we know. Transferring healthy, genetically normal embryos will be the game changer for us. We have to stay brave and stay focused and our babies will come... Right?